Emotional Intelligence, Explained!
Hello Lovely Humans!
Let’s begin with some basics:
We have all had moments where we feel overwhelmed by emotion. And for those of you who are new to this whole feelings thing, emotion is not something simply happening in the head, the brain, or the mind. Emotion is embodied (ie. In our bodies!) Individuals with high Emotional Intelligence (EI) can recognize and utilize emotion in a helpful and productive way. This is true in both our personal and professional lives. People with high EI are able to accurately recognize and manage the emotions of the self and in relationship to others. They are able to read the room and demonstrate stronger social skills. Some of the smartest (intellectually) people in the world struggle because they lack the ability to work well with people…. Which is all part of Emotional Intelligence.
For example, in our personal relationships, the ability to communicate effectively and engage in perspective taking is crucial in managing conflict and regulating the self. Individuals with high EI enjoy more relationship satisfaction than their lower EI counterparts.
Anyone who has worked in a toxic work environment can attest to the detrimental impact of managers lacking in self awareness and empathy. They may have a difficult time talking with managers without fear of retribution, or feel like they are walking on eggshells.
People with high emotional intelligence also have higher levels of resilience during difficult times.
Now if you’re still reading and hungry for more:
So if this subject interests you, and you’re a research and knowledge geek like me, read on for a little synopsis on some the key ideas around Emotional Intelligence.
But first, a little history for those of you interested in the backstory. The defining and understanding of emotional intelligence has only been part of scientific research and conversation for less than a century. The public discussion around emotional intelligence only became much more mainstream in 1995, after the publication of Daniel Goleman’s book, “Emotional Intelligence-Why it can matter more than IQ.” That book remained on the New York Times best seller list for over a year, prompting discussions around different skills and characteristics that drive leadership and performance.
Since then, several fields of study including psychology, neuroscience, as well as other social and behavioral sciences, have offered different theories on EI. Currently, there are 3 major theories on EI. Although each theory varies a bit, there is an over arching understanding of emotional intelligence as: the traits and abilities that allow individuals to recognize and use emotional states (in self and others) to solve problems and manage behavior.
So why is this so important?? And why now??
We have evolved quite a bit from the tribal days of hunting and gathering. But those tribal tendencies remain. And while we are no longer running away from sabertooth tigers, it seems as though we are now running away from our egos….only most of us aren’t even aware that we’re doing it! Currently, our culture is riddled with division and uncertainty. What better way to give yourself a leg up in terms of increasing leadership abilities, creating more successful relationships and just creating a better life for yourself??
Some people are naturally more attuned to the needs and emotional experiences of others. But many of us are not, and emotional intelligence is not something that was taught to us in school. Fun-fact: did you know that most people can only identify 3 to 5 emotions? That’s out of over 80+ different emotional experiences.
The good news is that emotional intelligence is something that can be cultivated and learned. Better humans is here to help you on your personal journey. Contact better humans for a consultation for yourself, your business, or your family. We will teach you the necessary skills to create a more fulfilling and connected life.
-Mia
